Yeah, I know. Turtles are slow. They're not even deviously persistent like the tortoise who beats the hare in Asop's famous fable. They're about one step above a three-toed sloth in the pecking order of evolutionary coolness, unless you count that one in "Finding Nemo," but even he wasn't that bright. So why the Bowlegged Turtle? Especially, for a company that builds exercise apps? A couple of reasons.
First, we are way into irony. Irony makes people think. Irony is sticky in marketing parlance. It turns out that things we find unusual or odd tend to work their way into the deeper crevices of our brains, not to be pushed out so easily by the next lame facebook post we read (sorry, you'll never get that 30 seconds back) or the next temper-tantrum-throwing kid in the back seat of your minivan. We hope the irony of a genetically-disadvantaged turtle making exercise apps will have the same mental stickiness as Forrest Gump when he busts out of his corrective braces and keeps on "run-in'... and run-in'". Seriously, what a great scene. We wanted to recreate it for a YouTube ad, but it turns out corrective braces for turtles are hard to come by. Please enjoy our brain image instead.
A Brief History
Second, there is some history. You knew there would be. As fate would have it, Snort, the founder of our company had some problems early on in life. He was born to two rather handsome and loving parents. Brad and Angelina had nothing on these two. Unfortunately, their looks were not passed on.
The problems started right off the bat. When his mother arrived at the hostpital, the doctor told her it things were not right. He wasn't positioned correctly and the labor was not progressing well. The ensuing hours with his face jammed against his mother's pelvic bone took its toll. When he finally arrived he resembled a raisin that had been used as a crash-test-dummy.
In time, however, the bruises began to heal and something remotely resembling a baby began to emerge. Months later, he was being carried about in one of those oh-so-fashionable yet slippery tricot blankets from the 70's and slid right out, falling from about five feet onto his face.
Some time passed and he attempted to crawl, er... paddle. You see he was, to put it nicely, a just a wee bit on the heavy side. His swollen head and chunky arms made it impossible for him to crawl normally. His limbs, bowing under pressure, could barely propel him a few inches before collapsing. To make matters worse, he had the unusual habit of snorting, which we can only assume was related to all the facial trauma. All of this earned him the affectionate if slightly sadistic appellation Snort the Bowlegged Turtle.
Like a Phoenix from the Ashes
Snort has since lost the weight and the face and head are almost normal, aside from a bit of residual grumpiness. The years of reclusiveness as he hid from the world certainly took their toll on his personality--there really isn't one to speak of--but his desire to make the world a better place through technology and ideas he's developed during that time has grown intensely. Bowlegged Turtle Designs was created to fulfill that vision.
I hope you'll enjoy our first product, FitBeat, which puts some fun into exercise.